Archive for April, 2011


Fan letter

Dear Darth Vader
I am your bigest fan can you pleas send me your old helmets.
Love
Meatball
PS rebellion pleas crush it

Rebellion! Please crush it! AAAAAaaaahhh! I only telegraph that message to the powers that be several times per weekend.

I couldn’t tell you where “Meatball” came from, although I have my (Rob) suspicions. Also, I am fairly certain that Rowan is not, actually, Darth Vader’s biggest fan. Just saying.

But, you know, if I were Darth, I think this would make me feel just a tiny bit used.

* * *

PS: Congratulations to Jennifer, Rachel L., and Julie, the three lucky winners of copies of Monday Is One Day. Rowan was very proud to pick your names out of my blue felt hat.


Last chance…

… to win a copy of the children’s book Monday Is One Day, by Arthur A. Levine: to enter, leave a comment here or become a Facebook friend of this blog (over there, to the right). Because I am not particularly famous cater to a select audience, your chances of winning are pretty good right now, and so you should take advantage of that. Seriously. If you don’t feel like writing about what you read with your kids, just type in something along the lines of “I want it,” and you’re as good as entered.

(That said, the website OnlineUniversities.net just listed me in their Top 30 Lesbian Blogs — along with some very cool other sites — so you’d best enter soon.)

Regular posting will commence shortly.



Sederpalooza & Book Giveaway Reminder

Well, we have survived sederpalooza and now my children are much richer, having been bribed by various grandfathers and other patriarchs to give up the Afikoman — or their perceived share in the Afikoman — for cold, hard, cash. They are also, I suppose, richer in culture and family, and these things are important, too.

(Prime cute, by the way: Isaac reciting the four questions, of which there are actually five; he got through the first three. I had been half-expecting him to pull a Michigan J. Frog on us and stick his thumb into his mouth and bury his head into my shoulder, but he stood on his chair and performed, singing all the Ls in “leilot” as Ws. Weiwot. Awesome.)

Now, we’re heading into the second half of our interfaith roster of spring celebrations, in which the children’s Uncle Will has untold fun hiding a jillion or so chocolate eggs around his sprawling backyard, and the children look for these, too. All these things — a hunk of matzah, foil-wrapped chocolate — to find: is this why people refer to Passover as “the Jewish Easter”?

Or maybe not.

BUT: what I’m really here to tell you is that you have only a few more days to leave a comment here or to become a Facebook friend of this blog (over there, to the right) to win a copy of Arthur S. Levine’s book, Monday Is One Day. Contest closes midnight Monday. Good luck!


Giveaway: Monday Is One Day

“I not going to cry any more when I go to preschool,” Isaac announced from the backseat a couple of months ago. “I just going to be happy.”

And that, my friends, was it: the abrupt, anticlimactic — although entirely welcome — end to the months of outsize emotions, the awfulizing, the vales of tears and the puffy eyes and the Kübler-Ross–esque stages of grief around day care. Turns out I was right all along: he does like preschool! I would say I told you so, but what’s the point? Being a parent essentially means giving up your right to say I told you so. I’m going to put that on a T-shirt.

It’s like that, isn’t it, with children? So little is linear. They don’t progress slowly, gradually, consistently, from one stage to another. Instead, it’s all passionate declarations and unexpected leaps, so abrupt that you don’t realize that they’re the results of months of, until now, invisible progress, practice. Rowan had training wheels, and — blink — now he doesn’t. Isaac cried about preschool, and now — hey presto! — he doesn’t. Now, when I arrive to pick him up at the end of the day, he sends me away, because he’s not ready to leave. Sometimes I watch him through the windows, see how he hangs up his coat on his hook and pours his own water from those little pitchers and shakes maracas at music time and tidies up his modelling clay as a matter of course, all the while chatting up a happy little storm to his teachers.

Still, he’s still very into the ritual of going through the days of the week: there are preschool days and babysitter days and family days, and almost every morning we do a little recital of the order of the week until we get to the weekend, when he gets to revel in his family: his two moms and his brother and his cats and the various aunties and friends and other central folks — like donor/dad/Rob — who make up our constellation. They’re still his favourite, the family days, but now at least he gets to enjoy them without obsessing over the fact that the week ahead will contain some preschool.

So I was very happy to read an early copy of Arthur A. Levine’s new kids’ book, Monday Is One Day. “The hardest part of going to work is being apart from you,” it begins: “Let’s count the days till we’re both at home with a special thing to do.” What follows is a rhyme for each day of the week: Monday is one day; Tuesday is blue shoes day; and so on, filled with dinosaurs, and cuddles and raspberries on the nose and tractors and guitars and the like. Levine, whose imprint at Scholastic is possibly best known as the publisher of the American editions of the Harry Potter series, wrote the book, he says, as he contemplated what it would be like to be apart from his then-infant son. What’s particularly lovely is the range of family types depicted in the illustrations: single parents (male and female), two dads, an older couple that looks as though they could be grandparents, and — so radical, and kudos to Levine, himself a gay dad, for including them — what looks to be a heterosexual couple. I can’t tell for sure, though, because there’s no footnote to explain each family structure: you just have to take each household at face value and assume that the intimacy between children and adults — “a kiss and cuddle, a dance in a puddle, a dinosaur huddle, a sweet family a muddle!” — is the result of years of not-so-invisible love.

"It's a nice book," says Rowan.

Scholastic has offered three copies of Monday Is One Day to me to giveaway to YOU: readers of this blog. To win, leave a comment on this post with the name of a book you love to read with your kids, or detailing your own family’s story of weekly rituals. Or something else somewhat on-topic; I’m not too fussy. On Monday, April 25, I’ll randomly select two of those comments to win books; I’m reserving the third copy for new Facebook friends of this blog: click on the link to the right in order to become a fan (and yes, that is a brazen grab for more friendship, and that’s all I have to say about that). Good luck!


Freewheeling

“It’s like having a baby,” I found myself saying to Rowan on Saturday, thinking to myself even as the words came out of my mouth that this was a ridiculous metaphor for a six-year-old boy struggling with gravity. But I continued, anyway. “It’s like having a baby and you don’t know exactly when it’s going to happen, or how, but you know it’s going to happen really, really soon. You know?”

Of course he doesn’t know, except that his eyes widened, and he nodded. “Yeah,” he said. “It’s going to happen really soon.”

And then, not eleven minutes later, he took both feet off the ground and placed them squarely on the pedals of his two-wheeled bike, stripped a week earlier of training wheels, and cycled the length of our driveway and back, and again, and again, and again. (Which is, come to think of it, pretty much exactly the way his brother came into the world: quickly and easily with almost no build-up, unless you count the preceding nine months or so.)

You’d think I’d be used to these milestones by now, raining down like hailstones — exactly, in fact, like the hailstones that appeared out of nowhere yesterday and covered the lawn with balls of ice the size of giant olives — over the last five months: Rowan swims! Rowan skates! First wiggly tooth! First lost tooth! Ties own shoelaces! Rowan blows his own nose! But no, I don’t get used to them. Watching him pedal furiously by on his bike, balancing on only two tires and sheer will, I thought of the scene in ET when the kids all of a sudden rise into the air on their bikes and fly. In other words, thrilling.

“Does it feel like flying?” I called out to him, and he called back “Yeah!”

And of course, there’s no going back, no (barring tragedy) un-getting your balance. Your whole life is has led up precisely to this point, and then it happens in an instant. In an instant, a paradigm shifts and you are a person who rides upright on two wheels, and how or why on earth would you have ever done anything differently? It is like being born, it is, that first breath drawn and cord clamped and cut and why which you ever breathe anything but air, ever, ever again?

Hailstones, saved for posterity in the freezer.


Words and numbers

So … the novel.

That sounds ominous, doesn’t it? I don’t mean it to. It’s just that it feels oddly, squishily, personal to post a status update on it here. Because this blog is — what? — so impersonal and all.

It’s just that there’s something about writing about one’s writing (my writing), one’s progress (my progress), one’s process (my process), that is deeply intimate, even when I devote whole categories of my writing life to, say, my children’s bodily fluids (not to mention their conceptions. Or their births.) or my mother’s death or my household’s sleeping arrangements. But, mostly, there’s a finely crafted line between real exposure and highly mediated snapshots of my life. I’m not saying that I’m really a hetero, childless, Presbyterian lover of camping or anything, but that I prefer to maintain some kind of illusion that the work of writing happens behind the scenes, to leave you, gentle readers, with the tidy end product as opposed to the messy, ugly process.

All of which is by way of saying that — oh, fine — I’m not finished yet.

Back in January, I had 200 pages and wanted to have 300 by the end of March. I have 247 pages as of today. I should point out that, in an effort to streamline the narrative, I also cut approximately 25 pages from the original 200.

Which means that I’ve actually written close to 75 pages in three months. (Honestly: I only just did that math for the first time right now.)

Which really is not so bad.

Which is, in fact, quite heartening.

I have written 75 pages of fiction in three months. That is more fiction in less time than I have ever written in my entire life. And some of the sentences in the 75 pages that I wrote over the previous 90 days actually make more sense than the preceding one. Just barely.

Neat.